Choosing a Therapist Webinar
Hello there, thank-you to those who attended the FREE Choosing a Therapist Webinar. Both Dr. Carole and I had a wonderful time. And we were tickled pink to receive the comments afterwards (see below).
As I mentioned, we received many questions - more than we could answer. If we didn't get to your question, consider re-submitting it for next time.
Click the links below to see the questions (you need to be logged in to hear the response).
Enjoy the show!
Be sure to post your question for the next...
Free Webinar on
Making Wise Therapeutic Choices
Choosing a Therapist: Attunement is Everything!
"Talk" Therapy: Are Words Enough?
The Process of Psychotherapy
Boundaries in Psychotherapy
Bringing the Body into Psychotherapy
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Suzanne and Dr. Carole:
I wanted to express how much I enjoyed your very first webinar. I was not able to listen to it live but found listening to the recording worked out very well. I have attended many live seminars and I have to admit that I was concerned that without some high tech visuals, ie: power point, demonstrations, specimens, or at least a quirky speaker to watch, keeping focused and alert might be a problem for me.
No problem though! I was captivated from the get go. Hearing you both interact and collaborate gave a whole new life to My Shrink. At times your voices were a little quiet and distant(like most seminars) but I just upped the volume a little. I thought the questions you selected covered a broad range of topics. Alhough I could not personally relate to all of them I thought they all had merit.
Several did have significant meaning for me. Lost and confused struggles with being the both the clinitian and the patient are very familiar to me, and often very confusing. Also MP touched a nerve. There were times I felt afraid to get better. I wanted to get better, but there was this little part of me that could not help feeling afraid of what would happen then. It is really reasuring to know that it was my brain looking out for me. But now I just want to be better and the devil with the concequences.
The last thing I took away was the concept of making new happy connections. Obviously having the right therapist is essential to having this kind of attunement But, this knowlege actually allowed me to relax and let my self live in the moment at therapy the other day. I just let myself feel. I did not look at the clock, I did not try to change the subject or rush out of the moment. I just felt…..connected and cared about. It felt right.
One more last thing. I think it is commendable that you are being up front and sharing your reasons for making changes regarding the support of My Shrink. I respect your policies concerning sponsorship especially with drug companies. I think that paying reasonable fees for some of your services is far better than being profiled and spoon fed by advertisers.
I wish both of you and the rest of your staff all the best and I am looking forward to your next webinar.
Wendy
Thank you Shrink ladies,
I found this very interesting, and I gained quite a bit of new info.
One suggestion I would like to make is (if possible) more diverse questions. I thought at times the questions were asking the same thing.
One question ( that I did not think of earlier) that is affecting me is – what can you expect (in terms of relating to the therapist) when you see your therapist out in public?
This seems to happen fairly regularly for me, and I don’t know how to handle it. It is a logistics thing. We both go to the same YMCA and swim laps, his office is near where my mom lives, he lives near a restaurant that I sometimes work at and he frequents. (He told me he lived near by when I ended up being the waitress serving his family). The whole situation can be most uncomfortable sometimes, and down right awful at other times. Atunement does not transfer to the real world.
Thanks.
Hele
My heart goes out to HOLTZ.
Hele
Ladies,
Thank you so much! Other people’s issues in this webinar have also been concerns of mine in therapy. I am also in the processes of transitioning to a new therapist. I found all of the answers to everyone’s questions helpful as well as one of mine that was posted in this webinar.
My mom has tried to be very supportive in my struggles in therapy and with anxiety and she actually found the Shrinklady’s site and I did the quizzes and have been trying to keep up with the site since.
I am so thankful to her for finding this site. I have since passed it along to other friends with therapy issues and struggles. I really enjoyed the session. I actually had to miss the original one and your editors were kind enough to send me a link to hear the webinar which I just listened to this evening and it was well needed and perfect timing.
Thank you so much and I look forward to hearing the rest of my question in a future webinar. ‘Lost and Confused’
Kim
Unfortunately, I was not able to attend the webinar live – because I am one of those ‘lucky’ people who spends her weekend working!
I just now finished listening to the recording and agree that Dr.Carole was a bit difficult to hear at times – but at least with the recording – I had the opportunity to play parts over and catch what was missed.
I want to thank-you for your comments to my question and you did something that I almost asked of you. When I was typing my question – I was wanting to put down “please read between the lines” and you did that! Thanks. May be I am the “right” client afterall…
Therapy is so confusing at times and receiving is really difficult! I guess it is scary and confusing at the same time – that someone could know what I need and give it to me! I don’t know how she does it and accepting what she gives me is so difficult and I don’t feel deserving.
You both were right on with your comments and I didn’t expect to get a response (that’s the unworthiness shining through).
Thank-you for taking the time to give me some support.
Kenna-Sue
Hi Shrinklady and Dr Carole
Thankyou so much for a great webinar. I found all your answers really useful, especially the one to my question, 2. The discussion on Q3 was also relevant because my ex-therapist was very psychoanalytic and sometimes did the silent treatment which I hated; therefore I could empathise with Jeff’s situation.
My main take-away from your webinar is to know that attunement, feeling heard and safety in therapy are essential for the client to move on and I need to look out for those. I got almost none of these things from this group therapist. In fact she presided over what was a very traumatic situation for me. I also realise that her misattuned interpretations had the effect of enabling this other member to be even more aggressive; oh, just thinking back to it reminds me how ghastly it was!
The idea of clients listening to their gut feelings was helpful too. I reckon my early disappointment with the group therapist was such a gut feeling, and I felt it even before things got difficult with that other member. If I’d paid attention to my unease much sooner, I’d have left or raised the issue of leaving way further back.
It felt spot on what you said about leaving bad therapy being empowering, and even better if you can say why to the therapist. Leaving this group was me taking the power to remove myself from a toxic situation, although I do regret having unfinished business with both the other member and the therapist. (After the event I can see more clearly what I needed to say – but that’s typical hindsight isn’t it!) I wrote a letter to the therapist after I’d left and that felt good, even though I feel I could have gone further in expressing my criticisms.
I really liked the way you ran the webinar and addressed the questions. I’s say the only glitch was that Dr Carole’s voice was not very distinct – a technical rather than content issue.
Could I write about my experience in the group on the Forum at some point? I know I have to be careful about observing confidentiality (eg: no names or identifying facts) but I think it might help to share – if it’s within Forum rules of course.
Many thanks again to you both and best wishes,
Sarah
Hello,
I came into the webinar late, the recorded voice said ‘announce yourself’ which confused me! So i didn’t… I also agree with Heather on feeling isolated and wanting to be in a chatroom or something. An hour is a long time to sit with a phone up to one’s ear! I think the information was great, though Carole’s voice was a bit too quiet on my end. Look forward to the next one, but also concerned about the price thing (as Michelle said). More questions about touch in therapy, what exactly is ‘body psychotherapy’, what training for that etc. i really liked the ‘happy moment pathway’ thing, that was a great reminder!
Thanks again
I really enjoyed hearing your voices and talking about these things. It feels so different hearing it then reading about it in text. I guess my comments have more to do with the format of the webinar then about the content. (I enjoyed the content!) I felt isolated. I think I would have liked to also be in a chat room with the other folks listening in. (An IRC chat room or something like that)
I thank you so much for providing this opportunity. I’ve been in therapy sessions for the past 18 months and have become fascinated with the process and how to get more from my weekly experiences.
Given that as a desire, I’m not surprised that this webinar’s biggest “take-away” for me has been 1. realizing the importance of becoming more assertive in my therapy by discussing even the most difficult stuff as it comes up for me — especially the aspects surrounding my relationship with the therapist because it reflects what’s going on in my life — and 2. the importance of staying with the positive at times. I am one who often wants to jump to the next thing I need to work on, and when my therapist has held me in the “positive” place, I have misinterpreted, thinking that the therapist was ‘bored’ with my problems. I didn’t realize that staying in that “happy pathway” moment is necessary to my therapeutic growth.
Suggestions — please keep spreading the word on the importance of the right brain/body therapy to which you so often refer. Thank you for the opportunity to utilize the 30% discount. I sincerely hope that the cost of your webinars will keep them accessible and will not be prohibitively expensive for most.
Again . . . thank you for this most useful experience.
Michelle
Eugene, Oregon
Hi Suzanne and Carole,
Well done! Thank you for your insight and candid discussion. Listening to both of you was helpful because you offered shared concepts and responses rather than a single opinion.
I was impressed by the questions submitted–most of which I’d thought of myself, so very appropriate to me.
I am seeing a counsellor at CWAV.org and I am partaking in some local events(www.claimyourlife.ca/Site/programs.html) – I can now add your guidance to my mix!
Virtual hugs,
Sharon
I enjoyed the Webinar today. I feel as though I’m more prepared to begin my search for a new Dr. and have a better idea of how to makes sure its someone I will be able to connect with. I guess a question I should have submitted would be… What kinds of questions should someone be asking a new therapist to see if they would be a good match!?
Anyway, it was great to hear all you had to say today and I’m looking forward to the next one.
Holly .. AKA Holz